thursday’s thoughts…

“you are not too old 
and it is not too late
to dive into your increasing depths 
where life calmly gives out 
it’s own secret”

~ Rainer Maria Rilke ~

IMG_0302

Posted in iPhone Moments, Quotes Tagged , |

my second birthday…

 

happy birthday (second birthday) to me. it’s been two years since my stem cell transplant. that evening the nurse who was with me said i now have two birthdays. my regular one and now this one. although to be exact this second birthday is on feb 29th.. leap year. but i’ll still say i’m “two” today. i’ll make some gingerbread cake to celebrate.

i still remember that night… anxiously waiting to hear that the plane landed ok and the person who had my new life in a cooler was on their way to the hospital. we had snow so it was already delayed but thankfully they finally came and the hospital prepared it. it was finally delivered to my room and my nurse hung up what hayley described as pink daiquiri (or some sort of cocktail) in a bag. i do remember how she, hayley, was taking pics of the stem cells and of me and then she wanted one of both of us. the nurse happily said yes and while she wasn’t supposed to, hayley, with her required face mask still on crawled into bed with me to have the pic taken. she stayed overnight and slept on the little bench thing/couch in the room. when i woke up in the early morning she was in her usual frog position. seeing this, in the early light, with my new life ahead of me was pretty overwhelming to say the least. to top it off, hayley came during her mid term finals so the fact that she was there during this time was even more poignant.

all in all while i’ve had some issues with my transplant and the last year has been a bit rough, i feel pretty lucky to have had this second chance. for without these generously offered stem cells, i may not have had..

i’m also eternally grateful for my french Love, Yann, my mom and my sister. All of whom have seen more then they should have and still love me and continue to take care of me. Friends and family who live far and wide have provided support that at times come unexpectedly and funny enough, at just the right moments, the times when i need that nudge to keep going and remain as positive as i can.

my life isn’t was i thought it would be and i can’t say for sure anymore what the future holds, but i do know that i will continue along this journey and will try my damnedest to see things in a positive light and along with faith and grace i will be the best i can be.

280067O-R2-043-20

Posted in being grateful, film is not dead Tagged , |

thursday’s thoughts…

“It is possible to believe that all the past is but the beginning of a beginning,
and that all that is and has been is but the twilight of the dawn.
It is possible to believe that all the human mind has ever accomplished is but the dream before the awakening.”

~ H.G. Wells ~

FH020002

Posted in film is not dead, Quotes Tagged , |

the morning after…

while I, like many of us our getting tired of this winter.. it’s mornings like this,
just after an overnight snowfall,
that makes me stand in awe.

IMG_1233 IMG_1235

Posted in iPhone Moments